Okay, let's see... Christmas was good. I got what I asked for (with the exception of scores as my parents don't know what I have), which means I have new ties, a new toaster, a nose hair trimmer (mom refused to buy one either for myself or dad... so we bought each other ones ;-) and some books, two Terry Pratchett Discworld novels, which I've already finished reading. I love having no work and no classes. I can just read to my heart's content. After present-opening, we played the brand-new Lord of the Rings Trivial Pursuit. Until we were late for dinner at my aunt's house. Hehe, but we made it not too late. Dinner went well, and Amy, Terry and I played Lord of the Rings Risk, which was actually disappointing. So Amy came up with a bunch of new territories and stuff for it based on maps she found in the novels. We'll have to give it a try soon. Another problem with the game is that the "continents" and territories aren't easy to see, like in regular risk. It seems poorly designed to me, but oh well. Mandy even called while we were there, so I got to talk with her a bit. I never seem to know what to say, though. I've always looked up to her, but I don't feel like we ever quite connected like we could have.

Friday went well. Long quartet rehearsal. Eizo brought Cannon (odd name, huh?), who Eizo bills as a friend but I suspect is his boyfriend. Cannon doesn't play, and to be honest kinda freaked the rest of us out by walking around Bobbette's house and generally being creepy. Oh well. Eizo seemed... not quite himself, but not as mopey as we had feared he might be. I wanna give him a big ol' hug but I'm not sure that's what he wants. Plus I wouldn't want Cannon to think I'm trying to steal him away...

Saturday was Grandma's birthday. So, we got up bright and early and made our way down to the nursing home after picking out some clothes for her. She was in a bad mood when we arrived, but we managed to cheer her up, I think. Her mind is almost completely gone, though. I don't want to live like that, so if you come upon me in such a state and it's likely that I won't recover (ie, I'm not drunk or something like that), put me out of my misery. Quickly. Anyway, in the evening was the wedding gig. It sucked. Badly. We didn't fade well or together, and we had a hard time seeing and hearing... but they were happy with it, so who am I to say anything? We learned a bunch, though. We need to learn to play in sub-optimal conditions, for one thing.

Arte got me a gift, too, so I'll try my best to remember her birthday (the 13th of January, I believe) and get her something. She got me a pride treble clef pin and a pride bracelet, which I will now wear everyday in the hopes that a) someone will see it and it will be a ray of hope in their lives to know that they're not alone and b) a cute guy will see it and ask me out ;-). I still need to talk with Brandon. Find out what he thinks of the situation. 'Cause I'm starting to get attached, and that's bad when the other person isn't even around (believe me, I know). She also let me borrow a couple books, one of which is the Front Runner, which is "the most celebrated gay love story ever." We'll see, but it is good so far.

Today, well... jazz rehearsal is about it. Dinner tomorrow with the quartet. I need to work on the ASSG website, and I'm really distracted right now so if I feel like it I'll finish this later.

Well, I know it's a bit late, but Happy Solstice, and in about a half hour, Merry Christmas.

I played a candlelight service tonight (actually two). It was a good service. Nearly inspired me to join. Fortunately, I regained my senses in time. But there was a certain sense of community that I haven't quite found otherwheres. DLP is nearly there. I'm not quite sure what it needs. But I think it will come.

We finally got ahold of Eizo, who has agreed to do the gig, though he will not be sticking around afterwards for dinner. Poor guy. I wanna hug him and let him know it'll be okay.

Folks, also, if you're mentioned in here, even if I'm not very nice to you, then you need to remember that I still like you. I like folks even if I find what they do silly. And that's most everyone, including myself.

I also wonder whether I've been very Taoist lately. It almost seems like I want to coerce events into what I want, which strikes me as very un-Tao-like. Maybe I should just let Brandon and myself be and take whatever happens? The other side of that, though, is that I don't want to miss out on something like that because neither of us was willing to make a move.

Supposedly Kyonee and Papu have a blog on blogspot. I want to find it.

And, Scott just helped me remember that, "whether you swim with the current of the tao or against it, it still sweeps you along." So the answer to my question is: relax.

And happiness was regained in the student, and the Tao flowed onward.

Goodnight. Merry (freakin' ;-) Christmas. Love to you all. May peace be found in all of your lives.